When Were You Last Afraid?

Over on Facebook a guy posted the following question:

“When was the last time you thought to yourself in the moment, dang I was lucky right there?”

It made me chuckle and I responded:

“Every time I work on something in my shed, so about an hour ago!”

I was having fun with the post, not really taking it in the spirit he wanted. 

But I was also telling the truth, almost every time I do work, not a work out, but some DIY or hobby woodwork, I am sure to count my fingers before and after to make sure I get the same number!

A slip of a chisel or the circular saw and I could come out with less than I went in with!

So far, I still have 10…..

But this isn’t what he was asking.

I think he was thinking more along the lines of something legendary Free Climber Alex Honnold said in an interview which was:

“When was the last time most people were actually afraid, when was the last time people faced actual fear, particularly physical danger, things where you could actually get hurt?”

Honnold goes on to talk about how facing real danger tones down your response to things that kind of don’t really matter, you don’t get worked up over little things anymore."

And he’s right, to a point.

The unspoken part of this is probably choice.

Facing fear on your terms is a different animal to having it thrust on you out of the blue, to have control taken away from you.

But you do tend to find the people who choose to participate in extreme sports, combat and impact sports, endurance athletes, tend to be some of the calmest, most level people you’ll ever meet.

They don’t get stressed by the minutiae, probably because they’ve expanded their tolerance for stress way beyond.

Just as a strongman doesn’t blink at a 100kg squat, he can do reps with 300kg, his limits are way beyond.

Like most things, stress management is a skill.

It responds to progressive resistance training just like the physical attributes of strength, mobility and endurance do.

And like training the physical attributes, it’s best done with a variety of exercises that start out quite easy and get more difficult as you progress.

Maybe not to the extent you try to climb a building without ropes as Honnold recently did. But you learn that you have agency, you understand that so long as you get through today, you have won, if you’re still breathing, you are still in the fight.

And speaking of breathing, breath practices such as Chi Gung where the exhale takes longer than the inhale are still the number one way to slow down your stress response.

This gives us 2 tools.

1) Deliberate exposure to greater stressors to widen our comfort zones and change our tolerances

2) Breathing drills to acutely manage ourselves in the face of stress, and also to practice being in a calmer state by default.

That way, when you’re in the shed and that chisel slips, or your in gym and you almost drop that weight on your foot, rather than freaking out, you simply think, as in Brandons question, “Dang, I was lucky there”

So I have a question for you

When were you last afraid?

What was it that made you afraid, and how did you manage it?

And more importantly, did you learn anything from it?

Let me know, I do read my emails and usually respond. I only ever share with explicit permission, so don’t worry on that front.

Regards

Dave Hedges

www.davehedges.net